NEXT!

I like Craigslist as much as the next guy. And as a regular reader, I am now able to classify garage sales/estate sales/yard sales…. just by their ad. Here are some of my observations.

1) The “ALL-CAPS: ad.  Seriously. I can read a newspaper at the bottom of swimming pool better than I can read all capitalized text. Be prepared for a lot of “I don’t know how this works” and “I don’t know where the part is for that” answers. Because nothing says quality like GINORMOUS WORDS!!!!

2) The “NO-Early Birds” ad. Oh their stuff is good. Too good. So good that they would rather haul all their good stuff back into the garage at the end of the day than see your “brighteyedandbushytailed” money buy it.  Plus, its fun to have a set time to start. It’s like playing “store”.

3) The Jokey-Joke ad. Oh this person is FUN-NEE! From their “Heck, I might even pay you to take it!” to the hysterical “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure!”….this sale is not…going…to..be…good. As in “LOL not good”.

4) The Minimalistic ad. Date. Time. Address. = One card table with Hot Wheels.

5) The Perpetual ad.  This sale happens every week. They don’t even try to change up the wording. Unless something blows over from the neighbor’s yard…expect the same ol’ tired stuff each time.

6) The Mr. Bossy-boss ad. You don’t even know what they are selling, where it is, or what time it starts. BUT you do know not to park on the street, ring the bell, or look their dog directly in the eye. Expect to find everything priced FIRM…lamps, toys…..toothbrushes. They aren’t messin’ around here folks. Stay focused…. and off the lawn.

7) The Super Secret Spy ad. You have to call for the address, ask for the passcode to the security gate, and then go around to the back of condominium to get to the hideout sale.  Chances are you’ll find a kindly woman sitting in her living room with cup of coffee and seemingly nothing to offer….except the ability to kill two hours of your time.

What ads do you avoid?

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4 Responses to NEXT!

  1. Becca says:

    HAA! this is classic and so true!

  2. How about the Multi-Family Yard Sale….they have their old Christmas gifts from Aunt Bertha and Uncle Ralph for the last 25 years. Aunt Bertha loves polyester lace and spray paint…..and Uncle Ralph is a wood “artist”. And of course they drag everything from the garage that has been sitting there since they moved in. Not quite multi-family in my dictionary since they are branches of the same family tree!!

  3. Heather says:

    Too funny! I have to say, though, that I have used “no early birds” in my yard sale ads before. It’s not because I don’t want to sell my good stuff, it’s because I’m a tragic procrastinator who stays up until the wee hours the night before, trying to price stuff and get organized, then has a hard time waking up early the next morning, and still isn’t quite ready when it’s time for the sale to start! (I guess I need to work on that …) It doesn’t really matter, though, since the early birds always show up anyway! 🙂

  4. Present company excluded on my amateur observations…;)

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